construction jokes

Two blondes in a pickup truck drive into a lumberyard.

One of the men walks in the office and says, "We need some four-by-twos."

The clerk asks, "You mean two-by-fours, don't you?"

The blonde says, "I'll go check," and goes back to the truck.

He returns and says, "Yeah, I meant two-by-four."

"All right. How long do you need them?"

The blonde pauses for a minute and says, "I'd better go check."

After a while, the blonde returns to the office and says, "A long time. We're gonna build a house."

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construction jokesA contractor dies on a fishing accident on his 40th birthday and finds himself greeted at the Pearly Gates by a brass band.

Saint Peter runs over, shakes his hand and says "Congratulations!"

"Congratulations for what?" asks the contractor

"Congratulations for what?" says Saint Peter. "We are celebrating the fact that you lived to be 160 years old."

"But that's not true," says the consultant. "I only lived to be forty."

"That's impossible," says Saint Peter, "we added up your time sheets!"

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(Got a joke you want to share? Send it in and we'll consider it for publication!)



Squeeze every penny of profit out of every job with CD Estimator,
the world's most comprehensive and affordable
construction cost estimating software



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